Oh how I wish that more people had common sense. Even just a tiny smidgen of common sense would be terrific. But, no–people have to be complete and utter idiots.
I consider myself a pretty calm, cool & collected person. I don’t freak out over most things. However, when it comes to my child, I am a fierce lioness, or, to put it bluntly: Don’t fuck with my kid.
My younger sisters came to visit us for 4 days last week. It was wonderful, the baby took it like a champ, being hauled all over the place, allowing her aunts to shop until they dropped.
The first lesson in stupidity took place at a mall kiosk. Oh how I loathe these people, and I avoid them like the plague. One of my sisters was enticed to a kiosk, where the saleslady tried her hardest to get my sister to invest in very expensive facial sea salts. She was willing to knock the price down to $145–which was more than 40% off the original price, dontcha know? Luckily, I found her (we were briefly separated as I nursed my daughter–which is a huge lesson in stupidity in itself…but I digress) before she was suckered into the “amazing deal”. Then, the other salesperson came over to me and said “awww, how cute, how old is he?” Please note, for the record, my daughter was wearing a lime green shirt with ruffles on the collar and sleeves, a pink butterfly in the middle of the thing, and pink pants. She also had a pink jacket. I said “she is 10 weeks old” THEN, For some ungodly reason, this salesperson thought it would be okay to put his hands on my child. I just said “Please don’t touch her” grabbed my sister and walked away.
Now–maybe I overreacted. Maybe I shouldn’t have been such a control freak when it comes to people touching my baby, but–I think that there should be some sort of unwritten rule when it comes to babies. Don’t touch them unless you ask. I mean, you don’t just go up to complete adult strangers and touch them (well, most normal people don’t). If anything, it should just go without saying to not touch a baby–who knows where your hands have been? When was the last time you washed them? Did you pick your nose an hour ago?
The second incident was not as dramatic as the first one. Technically, not even stupidity, just silliness. It happened the next day. It involved a lady in an elevator who commented on how many babies were in the mall, then said “he is so cute, how old is he?”
My daughter was wearing a pink and orange striped polo with jeans and white & pink weeboks (which are totally pointless, but so cute I couldn’t resist). I smiled and said “She’s 10 weeks old” and that was that. Not much, but when in doubt, I always ask, “how old?” or “how old is your baby?” and then the parent normally will use the correct pronoun so I don’t offend the parent or feel stupid. It really isn’t that big of a deal when people confuse the gender of the baby, I don’t get extremely offended. I feel good I live in an environment where color of dress doesn’t indicate to some people a baby’s gender, HOWEVER: don’t use pronouns if you are unsure.
Before I detail the biggest lesson in stupidity of the past week, I just want to comment on nursing in public. I personally have no problem nursing my baby in public when she is hungry. I’m not an exhibitionist, nor do I want the world to see my boobs, which is why I bought a really nice cover that is really awesome at keeping it all covered. It even has a little piece of plastic inside the fabric at the top that gives you a neat little gap where I can keep my eyes (and only my eyes) on my baby the entire time, so she doesn’t feel alone or in the dark. Anyway, I typically try to find a bench that is more private, or in the very least, one that is empty, so I don’t make anyone feel uncomfortable. But, it never fails, each time I do this, I have people who stop, stare, and in one case, a group of guys in their late teens to early twenties who passed by me THREE times as I nursed…maybe it was a coincidence. But, don’t think I didn’t notice, there isn’t much to do when by baby nurses in public except to people-watch. Some even stopped and pointed. However, the nicest thing was when a lady sat down on the bench that was back to back with the one I was on and said “are you breastfeeding?” when I affirmed her suspicion, she said “good for you, I’m a NICU nurse and we love to see women breastfeeding” It made my day. So screw all those people who felt I was doing something dirty in public. You couldn’t see anything–do you get offended when you see women walk around with tight shirts on? You see more then than you did with me. I’m proud of the fact that I breastfeed my baby. I don’t want you to see my boobs, they are private, which is why I covered myself up as well as I did.
Okay–this final lesson in stupidity blew my mind so much I keep bringing it up three days later. My husband and I took my sisters (and my 10 week old daughter) to the happiest place on earth. One of my sisters had never been (the other one has been to the 2nd happiest place, the one in Florida) but we thought it would be a fun trip. It rained on and off most of the day. My sisters had fun all the same, but I did my best to keep my daughter indoors, covered and away from the rain. When the rain cleared, we decided to have dinner outside the actual gates of said happiest place, but still on the property. We finished dinner and were going to go back inside the gates so my sisters could ride a few more rides. Then it started to rain again…hard. I had the baby in the stroller, completely covered (the car seat sits on top of the stroller and both of their shades come together to completely encase the stroller, protecting the baby from sun, wind or rain). The baby starts crying, she’s cranky. We go through the security checkpoint, and I have to open the cover so they can check the stroller (the checkpoint is covered with a tarp) I close it, leave the covered area and am waiting my husband and sisters to make it through the checkpoint. Apparently (this is hearsay, mind you), one woman in a group of people had seen my baby when I uncovered the cover and was commenting to her girlfriends at how cute the baby was (which is nice–my kid is pretty darn adorable) However, the woman’s stupid-ass friend wanted to see the baby, so she comes over to my stroller as I am waiting for my group to get through security, my kid is screaming her head off, the rain is pelting us all, and she comes over and says “oh, a baby” and reaches to OPEN THE COVER. I jerked the stroller from her reach and said “Don’t do that” she looked at me like I had slapped her in the face. Rightfully so. I have never been so pissed at a complete stranger before in my entire life. It would have been bad enough had she done that in the nice bright sunshine and my child not screaming her head off. But, the fact that it was raining like crazy, my kid was screaming, it was about 50 degrees (that’s cold here, okay?) made it even worse a transgression on her part. We left soon after. The rain just got harder and harder and I was feeling like the scum of the earth mother for allowing my little baby to be outside in the rain (even though she was completely covered from it). My mom and my husband both laughed at me later and said that it was okay and reassured me that I was in fact, not a horrible mother. Hell, even I have to look at it and say I was overreacting just a tad (about the rain, not the crazy cover pulling-back lady–she is still stupid).